The News

Friday, May 16, 2008

The News Current mood:fuckin jolly as santee claus I swear, in taking in the news I often feel like I'm reading The Onion. For instance, in an article titled "Vatican: It's OK to believe in aliens," Rev. Funes, director of the Vatican Observatory, is quoted saying, "Just as we consider earthly creatures as 'a brother,' and 'sister,' why should we not talk about an 'extraterrestrial brother'? It would still be part of creation." Apparently, some in the Holy Church would like to make up for persecuting Galileo when he publicized his then blasphemous theory of heliocentrism - 400 years ago. Funes states, "The church has somehow recognized its mistakes. Maybe it could have done it better, but now it's time to heal those wounds and this can be done through calm dialogue and collaboration." I guess you can't blame the church for trying, although it seems rather absurd that "calm dialogue and collaboration" about ALIENS will make up for generations of firm idiocy regarding the supremacy of the bible over scientific facts. I'm not complaining, I honestly don't care about the ways of the church as long as it doesn't affect me. But I can't help but be amused by it's antics. Last month, the papacy decreed that LITTERING is a mortal sin. So if you mash up that used cigarette on the pavement and walk away, you will go to hell. If you eat pistashios and carelessly let those shells fall to the ground, you will burn. And if you even dare discard that gum wrapper out your car window because you think no one will notice, you're wrong, God will notice and you will pay. I wonder what would be eternal punishment for such a sin.